Feng shuism

The Piggy year is finally here! A lot fortune teller will predict which animal sign got the most luck and who suffers the most. So which animal year you are born under? I’m a tiger and apparently this year is supposed to be a good year for people born under the year of Tiger. But you don’t have to be miserable and worry, even you have the worse of luck as predicted by fortune tellers, there are always methods to avoid all that. Just go to any feng shui shop and get yourself some jade/crystal/metal amulets to improve your luck / relationship / career / health / fortune.

I believe our action controls our destiny. Lets do some analysis here:


Object: Mandarin Ducks for romance and love
Mandarin Ducks are the most popular symbol of love in Chinese Feng Shui. It is said that when seen in a pair, the Mandarin Ducks' emit the kind of chi that is most conducive for love and romance. And more often than not, these loving energy transmutes to happy and harmonious marriages.


I say: Marriages is about trust, compromise, communication and love for each other. There’s no point placing the ducks besides the bed if the couple seems to be living under the same roof but raise hell every time some monetary or domestic issue arises. I don’t know how powerful is the quack quack duckling energy is but I love roasted duck meat! Yummy!


Object: Crystal pink bracelet
Light up pink fires of love and romance with the pink bracelet! Made of rose quartz crystal, the bracelet is said to be highly conducive for relationships and romance. It’s ideal for flirts and romantics alike.


I say: You need to get out there and start making new friends. Ask someone you know to introduce their friends or join cupid clubs if you don’t have enough ‘resources’. It’s not pathetic if you don’t think that way. Gather a few unmarried girlfriends to join and participate in their events. Who knows? Maybe your other half is also searching for you.


Object: Ru Yi
The Ru Yi, also known as the scepter, is a traditional symbol of rank, authority and success. In the olden China days, the Ru Yi were used by statesmen and government officials. In Feng Shui, the Ru Yi is believed to be able to enhance a person's career in very much the same manner!


I say: Nothing can help us in our career if we don’t know how to play the game at work. Don't make a fool of yourself in front of the boss. Concentrate hard on your work when the boss is 3 feet away. Surf the net when the boss is 3 days away. But don’t pile up on work. Work towards the deadline as we all need to have an impressive performance appraisal come year end. Ya unfortunately we still need to work our ass for that bonus / increment / promotion! This is what I called the 3-tang kung marn life:


Tang sek farn (wait for lunch time)


Tang fong kung (wait for office close)


Tang chut leung (wait for salary)


Object: Money toad
This mythical creature is said to appear every full moon near homes which the residents will receive good news the very next day. This is usually in the form of wealth or monetary gain.


I say: How can an ugly looking toad with a coin in the mouth bring wealth? Will the green ugly toad bring in more dollars instead of miserable coins if I insert a US$100 bill to the mouth? Think about it. Spent more than you earn and end up hugging the toad la. Even if you found a live toad and tie that creature under your sofa chair with a coin super-glued to its mouth, $ will definitely not fall from the sky as we need to work for it! Err frog porridge anyone?


And then now there are those self-claimed modern feng shui masters who give talks and write books instead of selling feng shui stuff. They claimed those objects has no affect on feng shuism. So who is right and who is wrong?

One even gave face reading tips on his website which goes like this:
“If your nose hair is visible, this indicates that you will barely have enough money to sustain yourself”


I say: Just cut those darn nose hair la! Duh!


Luckily my parents does not practice any feng shui philosophy. Yes we do have a set of fook look sau but its there because they look nice and has nothing to do with feng shui.


Can you imagine if you hire a feng shui sifu to check out your new house and he claimed that this door direction is wrong and that window design bring bad luck? What are you going to do? Sell the house? But the sifu will always have some ways to re-design the house, don’t worry. Just buy 9 gold fish with 1 black one to absorb all the bad luck and put the aquarium in the middle of the house or dig a pond in your backyard and breed some koi. Fortune will come flowing in like Tsunami! Ya right!


And according to some people, hanging fakes pineapple will supposedly bring wealth. Ya why don't plant some real pineapple and use them to make pineapple tarts! At least can bring in some $$$.


Don’t limit yourself to certain beliefs. Explore and you will find life is far more interesting and exciting without anyone telling you what your future holds!